很痛苦.. Very suffer..

嗨，
我真的快疯掉了，
就是一直放不下才这样，
我真的真的很辛苦，
我很想很想妳。
强逼自己爱上其他人，
强逼自己忘记妳，
强逼自己憎恨妳，
所作所为，
都只会导致自己，
对妳越来越着迷下去，
我甚至有点恨自己，
妳不可能会喜欢我，
可是我就是放不下，
以为早点睡，
不去想就会没事，
却睡下醒下，
妳一直断断续续的出现在梦里。
我不敢再告诉别人，
自己对妳的思念了，
因为只会导致自己很辛苦，
我好想哭出来，
却明白一种道理，
哭对于成年人来说，
是一种很愚蠢的行为，
没有人会同情与可怜我的眼泪。
今年是我过得非常辛苦的新年，
我不知道怎样才能忘记，
如果可以选择，
我宁愿选择不去告诉妳，
我情愿妳从不懂我爱上妳。
Sigh,
i'm really gonna crazy,
cause until now just because i'm can't put down,
i'm really really feel very very suffer,
i'm really really miss you very very much..
Forced self fall on other,
Forced self forget you,
summore forced self to hate you,
but all of this,
just only cause me fall more deep on you,
i'm hate my self,
knew you will never fall to me,
but i'm can't just let go it,
though go to bed early,
that can't let self stop miss you,
but keep sleep while and wake while,
just because keep dream you inside my mind..
Dare not to let people know anymore,
about the feel i'm fall on you,
did that just will let self feel more pain,
i'm really hope can be fine after cry,
but i'm understand that,
crying for a mature,
is an action very foolish,
no one will sympathy or pity of my tears..
This CNY will be my very suffer year,
i'm don't know what to do only can forgot,
if there could be choose,
i'm wish to choose never tell you my feel,
i'm hope never let you know i'm fall on you..

Sigh.. I'm know you read this, will never feel better than me, but i'm hope you just treat this as a joke, i'm feel very suffer to write out, if i'm don't i will really crazy, i'm can't choose msg you to write this just because will made you feel more suffer.. Please forgive all my childish action, i'm really feel sam tong to cause we become like this.. My friend said that why you still took me as friend, there because we have the 10years friendship, it's can't said throw it then can done it, if i'm really wan't forgot you i'm really need to stop my blog, start don't care you until you stop care me.. I'm feel suffer to made this decision, how will you think if you was me?

I'm dream again,
I'm lost again,
I'm miss you again..
Dumb2, remember the " noh 55!w w! "?
And this picture..

Sigh, this picture..

Midnight 04:17,
Page 64,
by Yht..