写给谁看？ Write this to who?

度过了2013年，
进入了2014年，
13 14，
对我来说是，
我这辈子的遗憾，
因为妳已经对我完全不在乎了。
2013 is over,
2014 is come,
13 14,
the meaning to me,
is the sorry of the life time,
because i'm made you totally give up to me..

玩得疯疯癫癫，
喝的烂醉如泥，
醒来后却空虚万倍，
一直在想，
妳已经不在乎了，
我写部落格还有什么意义？
看到妳对我的冷淡，
使我明白到，
当失去一个自己在乎的人的在乎，
是那么的痛。
Playing until crazy,
drink until drunk,
feel lonely very when awake,
keep thinking,
you're not care anymore,
what is the point of continue writing?
Sense the cool of your reply,
let me knew that,
when lost the care of someone i'm care,
is painful until can't write with any word in the world..

妳知道吗，
当年我被一个人伤害过，
以为她在乎我那么多年，
最后才发现原来，
在我和她过去那几年，
她不是那么喜欢和我在一起，
让我对人心完全失去信心，
每当一个人对我说些东西，
我就猜测到底什么意思，
往往就往不好的方向去想，
因为她已经夺走我的安全感。
可能是我的借口吧，
反正我已经不会再爱了。
Do you know,
at my past i'm was hurting by someone deeply,
i'm though her care me for so long,
at last i'm figure out,
the time she pass with me,
she was not really like to stay with me,
i'm lost trust to people from that time,
when people told me something,
i'm will guessing what the meaning,
when someone keep thinking that,
that will made the wrong direction of thinking,
maybe that she already took my sense of security,
or maybe this just excuse of me,
but never mind because i'm don't wan't love anymore..

我已经强迫自己忘记妳了，
因为如果不这样做，
我不知道还能怎样，
是的我已经痛够了，
我是一个人，
当妳无意识的伤害了我，
我已经不想再继续被伤害下去了，
我痛够了，
我也伤害妳够了，
我们连朋友都不能做下去，
既然这样，
我想念妳还有什么意思，
就算我忘不了妳，
至少妳不知道我忘不了，
妳已经不在乎，
对吗？
也许我的假设，
因为我感觉妳很陌生，
不再是那个我喜欢的妳。
I'm forcing self to forgot about you,
just because if i'm not doing that,
i'm really don't know what else i'm can do,
yea i'm feel pain enough,
i'm a human,
when you hurting me without motive,
i'm already feel not continue get hurt,
i'm pain enough,
what i'm hurt to you also enough,
even is friend we can't be,
become like this,
what the point i'm still miss you,
even if i'm can't forgot you,
at least you don't know i'm din't forget,
you're not care anymore,
right?
Maybe i'm assuming again,
because i'm feel stranger on you,
you already not the one whose i'm should be fall..

Midnight, headache very, after drink and drunk, i'm still feel lonely, maybe is just awhile, maybe is forever, but should i'm care anymore? Should not, because i'm become a zombie..

Midnight 04:25,
Page 49,
by Kenny Yht..